So, in case you haven’t already figured this one out on your own, I have ADHD – attention deficit hyperactivity disorder Full blown, “I get distracted by shiny things and – squirrel! – can’t sit still for more than 10 minutes” disorder.
I’ve often wondered how my ADHD fits into my life as a Christian. So many of the characteristics of my ADHD simply aren’t conducive to the stereotypical model of what a Christian woman should look like. I’m not quiet, I’m actually pretty loud. I can’t sit still through prayer – even if it’s 30 seconds, if I’m not the one speaking, my mind wanders. I’d much rather get up and move around than sit and listen to someone talk. I’m easily distracted, easily excitable, and am far more prone to fluctuations of emotion of epic proportions than a quiet spirit.
One of the things that I’ve struggled with particularly (and continue to struggle) is patience. If you ask a specialist, a lack of patience is actually a key indicator of ADHD. It’s simply not something I easily possess. When I want something, I want it right then. Waiting frustrates me beyond belief. Now, as much as I want to, I simply can’t write this off as a symptom of my disorder. And trust me, I want to.
Overhead, on the shelf of my desk, I have the Fruits of the Holy Spirit taped up to remind myself what I’m striving for. They’re placed in order of how they occur in the Bible. I find it particularly ironic that when I look up from my desk chair, the first once I see, directly overhead, is patience. Everytime, I’m reminded of what I don’t yet have. 
I want to be patient. But I want to be patient now. A lack of patience makes the Christian life very, very hard. I’m wrestling with this and more often than not, I feel that I’m losing.
I wish I had a nice little neat ending like “and then I learned to emulate the patience character of God and now I’m patient, and life is candy and butterflies.” But that’s not reality. The Christian life is far more often scraped knees and bruised skin. When I speak of my walk with Jesus, I should probably just say my “Stumble, trip, fall, scrape my knee, cry, get up, whine, and learn to keep going” with Jesus. Cause that’s more often what it is.
That’s what I’m learning. What are you learning?
I want to run,
but I haven’t learned to walk yet.
I want to sing,
but I haven’t learned to talk yet.
UPDATE: Wow! I cannot believe the popularity that this post has had. It’s been over 2 years since I first published this post, and the amount of emails, comments, and conversations it has sparked has been incredible. Considering that I wrote this blog for myself as a creative outlet – it’s a little overwhelming. God really can use anything!
That being said, I wanted to provide a few updates. I wrote this as a freshmen in college. I am now finishing up my junior year, and I have to say – a LOT has happened over the past few years. God has been working on me like crazy. Life has been incredibly hard, but God has been incredibly good.
I still struggle in my walk with the Lord – a LOT. Patience is still an issue for me. But I’ve learned one important thing – my ADHD is not the cause of my sin. To be sure, ADHD significantly influences the WAY that I sin, but it is not WHY I sin. I sin because I’m a sinner. And sinners need grace.
Perhaps that’s the biggest thing that I’ve learned. That Jesus died for that. Jesus died for my ADHD. Think about it – he died for yours too. He died for the anger, the tumultuous emotions, the impatience, the impulsive decisions. He died for all that. And because He did – we are freed.
The prescription for living the Christian life as a person with ADHD is the same as the person without. Grace. Grace upon grace upon grace. You might have to modify how you read the Bible, or how you pray, or how to control your decision making. But the need for grace remains the same. Pray for it. God will grant you grace abundantly when you ask.
And he will give it. He will provide the grace that we need to cover the inattention, the lack of empathy, the forgetfulness. The sin.
“Grace grace, God’s grace. Grace that will pardon all my sin.”
I hear you. I am in the process of learning too, and largely learning about the role of grace and how much I need it and need to give myself grace when often I feel frustrated by my ADHD.
It’s certainly difficult, especially when trying to get all of those “things” Christians are supposed to do in order.
Then again, maybe we have an advantage – we really can’t seem to “get it together” in the typical Christian way, so maybe we’re forced to rely on grace more? I’m not sure, but I’m learning
Hello Emily.
I also struggle with ADHD but I am also Bipolar. So it’s Adderall and Lexapro for me everyday. I’m currently researching for a book I’m writing and my studies have led me to Israel and Egypt and the cultures of the folks who wrote the Scriptures and the myriad of characters who live in them. you might be happy to know that based upon modern psychological studies of David, Solomon and Paul, it is fairly agreed upon that they, too, had ADHD and Bipolar-like symptoms.
It seems we’re in good company. And as far as those “things Christians are supposed to do” are concerned? I would just concentrate and getting to know Abba every single day and those things take care of themselves. It took me 20 years to learn that one.
Bless you, sister!
John
oh do I know the struggle. I’m going through the same thing (only on the male side) glad to know there’s others who face the same hardships.
Hi! I stumbled on this blog as I was searching for some reference on ADHD and the Christian. I have ADHD and I truly relate to Emily’s comments. I am a doctor, a mom of 3 kids and I still cant balance my checkbook, plan dinner or keep track of stuff for my kids! I can write a killer research grant in a week but cant keep track of my appointments. I am beyond impatient…and I speak a different language that only I understand most of the time. Its called “gestures..you should know whats in my head- ese!”
Ive been a christian for over 25 years. I have struggled with embodying the fruits of the spirit for so long and yes, it makes you feel like despite all you have achieved you are still failing at the major leagues. I wonder what God sees? what Jesus thinks of ADHD? I agree that many of the great biblical characters had to have had similar symptoms/issues and not just Jonah and Isaiah!
So what do we do with all this? Do we need to talk before we can sing? Do we need to walk before we run? Maybe not…maybe its ok to do it out of order. Maybe just maybe we should focus on what and how GOD wants us to do this rather than what every one around us expects.
I read a website that basically stated that ADHD symptoms suggested rebellion against submitting to GOD and that people like me should be made to submit and listen and.. i lost track of the rest of the stuff that was said.
It is a GIFT. I pray for insight mostly these days- so that I can understand how gifted I am and how to use this gift to the best of my God given ability. I have stopped trying to fit me (square peg) into a round hole. I try instead to find alternative ways to open the door, skin the cat or whatever, there is always more than one way to do it,
with Dignity and Grace.
I am so grateful to have found this page, you all made me laugh and shoed me not to take myself too seriously. I have adhd and temperal lobe epilepsy on top of it. Ritalin and Tripleptol have played a major role in my life and while they may help in my day to day activities, it has not helped my walk with God in the least as sitting down to concentrate on a verse or book in the bible is an absolute no no. That is how I came across this blog and am so grateful to have seen my life covered in a few sentences. I will definitely be back. Wow Dr. Mom, how you managed to conquer the medical world with your prognosis is by Gods grace alone, so you must be doing something right. You all really lifted my spirits. Janet, I am living your life this side to a T! You are not alone! Thank you!
Great post. Love your remark “I want patience, but I want it now!”. So recognizable. For me (male, nearly 40, only very recently diagnosed with ADHD) I suddenly realized some of my best successes (I’ve run three businesses at the same time
and some of my worst failures (not all of them survived 
were at least in part due to the dopamine deficiency we know too well.
But I also realized my spiritual growth – or lack thereof – was highly influenced by this. I always wondered why I couldn’t focus on even my own prayers if I weren’t saying them out loud, for instance. If you can’t even pray … I guess I’ll need slot of discipline and a lot of creativity to follow Christ my own way. The discipline may be tough, the creativity comes with the territory though
Good luck, thanks for sharing.
I am so glad I came across this. I did a search for Christian and ADD. I have had it my whole life though was diagnosed when I was 12 and am now 27. I have been a christian for a long time but never went to church until I met my husband in 2002. The walk has been a slow stumble fall walk. I question everything as I love to research and I get very confused and bored with the bible really fast and tend to avoid reading it. I am currently trying to change this. I have trouble remembering to pray regularly and in the last few years have decided to write down all of my prayers in a prayer journal as it tends to keep me on task and keeps my mind from wandering part way through. I wish there was a way to make the bible tolerable for me. I also wish there was a group/ forum where us Christians with ADHD can come together and discuss things and discuss new ways that might help others with their walk. Oh yeah and patience is something I am constantly failing at on a regular basis.
I know the feeling. Here are a few things that have made Bible reading a little better for me. First, I do it every day at the same time in the same place, usually with a cup of coffee. The routine helps my brain get ready to read. Then I pray that God would grant me grace to focus and pay attention, and that he would keep Satan and distractions away. Secondly, i almost always use a reading plan. The preset schedule helps keep me from the dilemma of “what to read”. Thirdly, I never try to read more than 1 to 2 chapters a day. I read those chapters twice at the most, and then put it away. If I’m having a really bad day and simply can’t get it together, I will listen to an audio recording of the Bible while I’m doing something else mindless like washing dishes or cleaning my room. I have an ESV study Bible that comes with a subscription to the ESV website which has the entire Bible audio recorded, so I use that, but there are lots of recordings out there.
And as for patience – well, I’m learning a lot about that right now. I’m realizing that patience (at least the godly, holy kind that the Bible describes) has less and less to do with my ADHD and more and more to do with a quiet soul that rests in the promise of what God desires for my life. And right now I’m learning that by going through a long, arduous period of my life. It’s not my favorite way to learn, but I’m learning.
If you really want to learn patience, I know that the Lord will graciously respond to teach you if you ask. With ADHD, we may have problems with patience, but everyone grows the fruit of the Spirit at different rates. But, if they are a Christian, they will grow. Don’t give up!!
God made us, ADHD and all, and He is sovereign over it all.
Francine Rivers writes books about figures in the bible which helps ADHD sufferers relate to in a big way and makes the bible real. Like Wilbur Smith on Africa and Stephen King on thrillers, Francine Rivers takes on characters in the bible and their life stories and provides you with a book that you can’t put down. She has helped me grasp the monotonous, mind numbing and confusing word and turned it into something I can understand and relate to. She is a God send for ADHD and their christian walk. Hope this helps …
Those are some good ideas and it makes sense. I am actually trying to learn patience with a friend who I am mentoring at the moment who isn’t really taking my advice and I think she is going to have to learn some things the hard way. It is taking a lot of patience to stay by and help her and know that it is very possibly I could end up watching her crash and burn and have to help pick up the pieces when if she had listened some advice she would have avoided the problem.
I have read Francine River’s book lineage of grace book about 5 women in the bible and it was amazing. It was the first and only time I felt these people were real and were speaking to me. I know she wrote one about 5 men of the bible and I still have to track that down and read it. I wish she would just write the whole new testament out because it would be amazing to me.
I think I definitely need a reading plan and definitely need to put bible reading into my schedule a long with a whole bunch of other things. I think that would really help.
Do others here feel they have problems hearing from God or getting a word from God. I feel my noisy brain masks a lot of what God might be trying to say to me during the day. The only time I know for sure I have heard from God and usually it is something important is in dreams that are way to real. This has only happened 3 maybe 4 times though and can be 6 months to years apart. I am pretty sure he talks more then that in general. Any ideas?
I really truly believe that the only way to hear from God regularly is to read His Word regularly. The Bible is God speaking to us. If we become familiar with the Word, we become familiar with this voice. And then we’ll recognize His voice when he speaks to us. It’s just like with a friend. If you spend a lot of time with them, listening to them, you can pick their voice out of a giant crowd. Heck, spend enough time and you can probably pick out the way they cough (true story.)
But yeah. That’s what I think. I also think purposely clearing your schedule to spend time where you can have quiet and emptiness without any kind “activity” allows God room to speak. I find that the best time for this, at least for me, is early morning. I wake up two hours before I have to be anywhere and use the first hour of my waking day to sit in the silence with God. I read my Bible, pray, and then just listen to Him. It really does help.
Many of us w ADHD crave deeper learning in Bible study versus the volume. I know see the higher value for me to meditate on one verse in the Amplified version or a whole section to seek to understand God’s perspective I am a kinesthetic learners so it works for me to write it out as written and also in my own words. The smart phone app., The Version helps a lot when I email sections to myself then insert spaces so I can really chew on it. Jeremiah 9:34. Proverbs 3:5-6. James 1. Jesus Calling is a good devotion book reminding me each am and bedtime to keep it simple and cry out to Christ Jesus…and start over fresh each day.
I am so glad that I have stumbled on to this site!!! My best friend is 55 year old male with ADHD and oh how he struggles with his Christian walk.. I want to help, but his impatience prevents that on so many levels. Can someone offer some solid methods of supporting an adult with ADHD. He loves the Lord and means well but as the story goes……. Everyone always blames his problems of disodedience but I see something totally different… Help!!! and thanking God for each of you in advance.
Is he medicated? If not, I advise you to advise HIM to get medicated. I know a lot of Christians advocate against it, but it has literally been a life saver to me. I also urge him to get a Biblical counselor for some behavioral counseling. I suspect if he is anything like me that he has some deeply ingrained habits that need help to reverse and change.
I suspect that his problems ARE disobedience (anything that is not faith is disobedience), but his disobedience may not be motivated by sheer stubbornness as much as ingrained habits and patterns of thought caused by his ADHD. I have some wonderful friends who counsel constantly to see past my ADHD and not allow it to take the blame for my sinful behavior. While I do believe that my ADHD does contribute significantly to the WAYS that I sin, I can’t say that it is the REASON I sin. I sin because I’m a sinner with a heart that often desires things that don’t glorify God.
Other than that, PRAY. Pray like crazy. God can change anyone – he’s changed me completely. And offer your friend grace upon grace upon grace. Radical, unrelenting, pursuing grace is one of the most effective agents of change.
Praying your friend gets the help he needs!
I have have ADD and have trouble on my christian walk though it has slowly gotten better. Anyway I was diagnosed at age 12 and since you dont out grow it am still learning to deal with it at age 28. I was never medicated. I learned lots and lots of coping techniques. I tried medication for 3 months last year and it worked for about a month and a half before it started having adverse affects and gave me wicked headaches. I suggest trying to look for help from several associations. There is a ton of resources out there for this condition. Just requires a little searching online as well as there are many books out there as well. I am also doing neuroptimal Neurotherapy to help with my ADD and Bio feed back is also another good choice. Medication has to be carefully weighed with pros and cons (this opinion is from doing research and has nothing to do with religious views i was the one who was given the choice to be medicated or not and chose not to be, I believe everyone should do what is best for them). Take a peek at that site and search for some others. I have a bunch stored away I will have to take some time to look them up. I hope he is able to get the help he needs it takes a lot of courage to think it through and to deal with it but he can come out on top and learn to manage but I do believe that the christian walk will always be a little harder for us.
http://www.add.org/ Is a site for adults with ADHD
Which Christian college should we consider for our daughter with ADHD. She loves math and science yet struggles with writing and organization. I am willing work more hours when she shows more self initiative.
My experience has been validated a lot by a continuing education course I took from Western Schools. I recommend it as a book. The name is something like, “ADHD thru a Lifetime.” and is found online. It explained why many of us need to work partime, hire others to help us organize, need coaching and mentors, etc. It explained why my exhusbands looked attractive and what shaped my identity. SHAPE, from Rick Warren’s church, the tool that shows my unique design, made a huge difference. As a RN, I treasure the flexibility and variety of my work. I am grateful for the smaller classes at Junior College but I don’t know what is available now my for teen who struggles with writing an has high aspirations to be a scientist.
Sorry for taking so long to respond Emily, after much prayer and thought I do understand you affirming that disobedience could indeed be a source of some issues (due to the lack of faith). Much prayer is indeed needed to overcome what has become a stronghold. But I fully believe that Greater is HE……. I appreciate the encouragement that has been offered and will continue to be supportive and relentless in extending and seeking God’s grace…. Much love to you!!!!!